Coping with Another Loss

As I sat there feeling the little life we had created slipping from my grasp, I started pleading with Heavenly Father, "Please don't make me go through this again." I said it over and over and over. Tears started streaming down my face, and I began to sob. 

I later found comfort in the scriptures. "Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest." (Matthew 11:28)

As traumatic as this sixth miscarriage is, I understand and accept that it is my burden to bear. We may never know why I keep having miscarriages, but we understand that God has a plan for us and that he hears our prayers. We also lean on the shoulders of our family and friends during this difficult time. We don't expect anyone to fully understand what we are going through--I don't wish that on anyone! But we do need your support to keep moving ahead. 

We cry as we mourn the loss of yet another pregnancy, but we find immense joy in being parents to Grant. He is such a sweet boy, and we are so thankful for him. 

As I reflect on the past year that we have had Grant in our family, I remember the complete happiness that we felt when we made it so far with a successful pregnancy! I am SO grateful that we were blessed to be Grant's parents. While it is difficult at times (mainly between the hours of 12am and 4am), it is so wonderful to watch him learn and grow. 

I know that Jesus Christ suffered for my pain, and that he knows exactly what I'm going through. I know I can be healed through His Atonement and become stronger from this experience. 

10/2/13

I had another ultrasound and it looked great! The sac had grown, and we were able to see the yolk. (Sorry, no pictures--they didn't give me one!) No fetal pole yet, though, so the doctor put me back a few weeks--5 1/2 weeks. I go again for one last ultrasound (at least for a little while...) on Monday. So far, it is looking good, though! Not really many side effects except for excessive tiredness.

Grant has started walking! He is now into pretty much everything. He doesn't like to be held (or pinned down for diaper changes!) unless it's time for bed. He still likes to snuggle with me! I weaned him on the 25th--so we made it almost 11 1/2 months! Let me tell you, breastfeeding is a lot of work! It is something that takes SO much dedication and time, but I am so glad I was able to do it. It was rough in the beginning! I probably had the roughest time of anyone I know, but I think it was worth it. I will definitely nurse the new baby, but I think I will invest in a neck pillow. My neck will never be the same!

9/25/2013

5 Weeks 6 Days

We had an ultrasound today. The doctor wanted to check to make sure there was a sac, and that was all we saw. He was a little concerned that it was so small, but since I only had one cycle, we aren't sure exactly how far along I am. We go on Oct 2 for another ultrasound to (hopefully) see growth in the sac.